


Blue Hued Thoughts of Love

by theythinktheyknow



Category: IT (2017) RPF, IT - Stephen King
Genre: Angst, Fluff, I wrote this so fast because I’m so sad, IT Chapter Two Spoilers, I’m so sorry, M/M, Not A Fix-It, Sad, happy ending ish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-10
Updated: 2019-09-10
Packaged: 2020-10-13 16:06:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,127
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20585240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theythinktheyknow/pseuds/theythinktheyknow
Summary: Richie remembers.   Because how could he forget?





	Blue Hued Thoughts of Love

**Author's Note:**

> Okay. I’ve written this note so many times, and I think what I really want to say is this: These characters mean more to me than any I’ve ever read about. This book holds such an incredibly important place in my heart, and sometimes these guys are more friends to me than the ones I know in real life. Because, to be honest, who’s to say these guys aren’t real. If you can write it, it can be. That’s what I believe. And so after this most recent movie, I just had to write this. I honestly didn’t even know what it would be until I began writing, but I knew I needed to write it. 
> 
> This is for Richie, one of my best friends, despite the barrier of the pages he resides in, along with the six other losers. They’ve been with me for so long, and they’ve helped me when I’m in pain, when I don’t know what to do. I hope this can help Richie. Because if you can write it, it can be. 
> 
> Stand strong, Trashmouth, because all the rest is darkness. We love you endlessly.

_“I fucked your mom”_

_Richies tear filled eyes._

_His timeless smile, despite everything. _

_That soft laugh layered with the fear, the sorrow, the deep-seeded agony that was coursing through his veins as he had to watch his best friend die right before his eyes. _

_He stayed for as long as he could, but they all had to be there to end It. Richie didn’t want to leave his side. He pleaded and begged with God in those moments as he ran towards the others, begged for Eddies life to be spared, begged for him to still be breathing when he returned. _

_But the walls came tumbling down, over their heads in giant cracking chunks, came down so fast, and Richie had to let go of Eddie, had to let go of his head which he cradled so dearly and closely. He had to see Eddies body sitting ragged against the stone, see his clouded, wet eyes which had last seen Richie. He didn’t want to go. He didn’t want to leave. He wanted to lie down next to the Eddie and let the rocks crush him, let the world crush him in one final time. It would be ironic, that he should let the world crush him under itself to be with the man he loves. _

_Getting out of Neibolt was a blur, nothing to remember except his own screams all the way, his own throat-ripping, agonizing screams of Eddies name, over and over, as he begged and pleased ever more, despite knowing deep down that it was no use. _

_And standing on the road, fighting against all of his friends, still screaming Eddies name, as they witnessed the house die it’s most permanent death, Richie thought he knew what if felt like to die himself. _

_He sank to his knees, and he stopped screaming. Defeated._

_He saw the dust and smoke rising up into the air, and he thought that was Eddie. _

_He sat, surrounded by his friends, a few less than he’d started with all those years ago._

_At the quarry he jumped. He wasn’t quite sure why. But he did. _

_In the water he sobbed, and he shook, and his tears flowed down, down, down, to mix with the water that Eddie once swam in, that Stan once laughed in, that all of them grew up in. _

_He closed his eyes and down he went as well. It was warm, the sun through the water on his face. _

_He cried there, alone, not for the first time. This was not the first time, because yes, yes there had been a time before. A memory that even now, even after all of the others came back, was still hazy and distant. A memory from that summer. And now, under the water, alone, he lived it once more. ___

_ _

_ _“Richie— you fucking dickhead what the fuck is the matter with you! Slow down!”_ _

_ _Eddies voice floated up the path from somewhere behind him, somewhere close by. The wind in his ears muffled it slightly, but he knew that if he turned his head he’d see him just a few yards away, running to keep up. He smiled, because he didn’t turn his head. He ran, and he ran, and he ran, his calves burning with that familiar ache that comes from this path, this place. He ran hard, and then, just before the ground fell out from under him, Richie jumped. _ _

_ _Sky blue and dark blue switched places for a brief second, as he fell down, down, down, and then it was all over, and he was under. _ _

_ _A few seconds after, he heard the sound of Eddie hitting the water as well, saw the mass of white bubbles which surrounded his body, as they floated up, up, up. But Eddie remained. And so did Rich. He swam to him then, his limbs cutting through the blue, his vision blurred, and all he could think about was how angelic Eddie looked, with the sunlight drifting from up above him, a halo around his head. His face was so young, his skin fair and soft. Richie knew it was soft because he was touching his cheek with his thumb, cupping his jaw gently. _ _

_ _Eddie smiled, and in his eyes Richie saw something, as if Eddie knew something that he didn’t, that he couldn’t. He looked at Richie in this way for a long, moment, his hair drifting outwardly with the water, his own hand coming up to grab onto the other boys’. Richie stared back with a smile, although he didn’t understand what that look meant, or why Eddie looked like that, like nothing he’d ever seen before. _ _

_ _Regardless he smiled. He smiled because he was thirteen years old, because it was summer, because the sunlight shone so beautifully on Eddies face, so close to his own. He smiled because he loved him. And he knew that whatever Eddie was thinking, whatever that look meant, he loved Richie too. He knew he could stay under there forever if it were possible. He didn’t want to go. _ _

_ _But his lungs began to burn, and his eyes as well, and he knew he had to leave. So with a last look at Eddies eyes, his face surrounded by nothing but the blue hued thoughts of love and warmth and safety, and being thirteen fucking years old, he swam up. . . up. . . _ _

_ _

_ _ _Up. A sharp gasp of breath, like the first one taken in 27 years. The cold air on his skin, already pricked with goosebumps. A look to the left, and a look to the right._ _ _

_ _ _Richie was alone. No, that’s not true. He wasn’t alone. But he wasn’t there either. He searched around in a haze, moving slowly, yet his arms flew frantically, feeling the water, seeing the sky, seeing the trees high above. But not seeing him. _ _ _

_ _ _“I feel him too.”_ _ _

_ _ _It’s Bev who speaks, floating towards Richie from where they’d wandered off to. _ _ _

_ _ _Richie’s still sobbing, he’s not sure he ever actually stopped. His mouth trembles with the words that want so badly to spill out, but cannot. _ _ _

_ _ _“H-H—He knew. He knew something that—“ He stops short, that’s not what he wants to say. He breathes in deeply, in one shaky motion, his eyes falling closed. When he opens them again it’s still then, it’s still now. _ _ _

_ _ _“I loved him. I love him, Bevvie. I love him so f-fucking much.” _ _ _

_ _ _Beverly doesn’t smile, her eyes are shining, too. But she nods, because they already knew. Because to say it out loud would be insignificant, and they were anything but. _ _ _

_ _ _She leaves him then, joining the others, as Richie soon will himself. _ _ _

_ _ _But for a moment longer he floats. _ _ _

_ _ _And for the rest of his life he remembers. ___ _ _

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah....the newest movie fucked me up pretty good...
> 
> Anyways, if you want to, comment what the Losers Club means to you, i’d love to hear


End file.
